Do You Sell Used Cooking Oil?

Since the price of gasoline crossed $4.00, I have been getting an increasing number of phone calls that are just annoying the hell out of me!

Phone Rings...Most likely this occurs when I'm at the farthest point in the yard, so I walk quickly (no more running for me, that ended about 3 years ago when I tripped over my own feet and went down. Took me two weeks to work all the pains out) hoping whoever is calling will let it ring more than 6 times.

[Note: I am polite throughout the conversation, just getting a little exasperated as it progresses]

ME: [answering phone] "Name of Company" Oil.

CALLER: Who's is this?

ME: "Name of Company" Oil, may I help you?

CALLER: Do you sell used cooking oil?

ME: No. This is a crude oil facility.

CALLER: You don't sell used cooking oil?

ME: No, sorry.

CALLER: Do you sell new cooking oil?

ME: NO, as I said this is a CRUDE OIL facility.

CALLER: So, you don't selling any cooking oil?

ME: No.

CALLER: Do you know someone that sells used cooking oil?

ME: No, sorry.

CALLER: You don't know anyone?

ME: NO! I told you this is a CRUDE OIL FACILITY. What makes you think I'd know where to buy cooking oil, used or new, outside of a supermarket? [then being helpful] Maybe you can try "restaurant supply" or "recycling services" in the Yellow Pages.

CALLER: Do they sell used cooking oil?

ME: I haven't a clue, perhaps you should call them and ask.

CALLER: So, you don't sell used cooking oil?

ME: [AAARRGGHHH!!!] No! I hope you find what you're looking for, good luck.

CALLER: [click]

I admit, to a certain degree, I milk it. Most of the callers seem to be in their late 60's+, but they made me drop what I was doing and scurry across the yard, so I'm willing to sit for two minutes and go through the routine...again.

For most of these guys I'd be willing to bet that if they converted their vehicle over to running on used cooking oil, the cost of conversion added to the price of used cooking oil these days (nobody gives it away anymore), they wouldn't outlive the the investment costs.